It would appear that by chance, the pattern of my posting is post once when I am reminded of this website, forget about it for months, then post again once I remember. SO lets keep with that pattern and slam out a post right now.
My life is basically a hot mess right now.
There are countless things going on, for some reason this year people decided that they want to befriend me. And I have mixed feelings about this. I have all these new guy friends and it kindaaaaaa weirds me out a little. As part of my nature, I constantly question the intentions of anybody who decides to start talking to me or hanging out with me, and that tends to bite me in the butt.
I have *counts* 11 new guy friends this year. Before this year, I had an outstanding 2 guy friends. So being the weirdo I am, I am instantly wondering why all these guys want to talk to me all of a sudden. Am I more friendly now? Are they realizing that I'm a nice person? Or are they all just getting tired of being single and hoping to get lucky with me since I'm forever alone?
It kinda drives me crazy to not know their intentions....
SO BASICALLY my theory is that every guy who has befriended me is hoping to gain something from our friendship. So I obviously have a severe trust issue, but I have no idea what made me like this. FOR EXAMPLE: One of my new guy friends is in the class I TA for, so my theory is that he's using our friendship to get a better grade; Another one of my guy friends likes my best friend, so i think he's using our friendship to get closer to her; One of them isn't that smart, so he's using me for the answers on homework; One of them doesn't have anybody else to talk to in class, so he's using me to stop from being bored in class; One of them is having girl trouble, so he's using me as "sloppy seconds"; One of them is friends with one of my friends, so he's forced to acknowledge my existance... And the list goes on. I literally have an excuse for every new guy friend I have... Which is a mental problem that I'll have to face at some point, but for now I'd rather not think about it.
OTHER THAN THAT. My life is peachy swell. Besides the grades stress, the fact that I'm getting fatter by the day, and the fact that I'm lonely 24/7. So anywho, I think I've rambled enough for one post....
